Emotions
by Dragonflys-Girl
Summary: Kate's emotional breakdown lead to a whole new page in life. [Tony Kate]


Title: Emotions  
  
Author: Peach  
  
Rating: PG  
  
Category: slight R  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own them. Don't sue please

Notes: It just striked me as odd that in The Bone Yard, Tony and Kate arrived together the next day (you know, when they were talking teasing McGee about having to expect the unexpected?), so here's what my imagination dreamed up...

Note 2: Unbeta'ed, so all faults and errors are mine. I haven't slept more than 3 hours a day for the past week too, so, consider yourself warned!

"Tony," Kate called out suddenly on the way back to headquarters. "Can you stop here?"

The ride back from Coleman Park was awfully quiet. Tony had tried to start a conversation several times, but Kate's non-commital responses had kept talking to a minimum. He had thought of asking her straight out what was wrong, but thought better of it. After all, being partner with Kate for over a year had taught him that when the former secret service didn't want to talk, she wouldn't budge, not one bit.

Even though Tony didn't know what it was that Kate wanted, he pulled over as she asked, hoping to find out more when he did, wishing that she was ready to talk to him.

"Thanks," she said, and, much to Tony's disappointment, released the seat belt and grabbed her purse. "I'll see you tomorrow then?"

"Kate, are you all right?" Tony reached out to hold her elbow before she could open the car door fully. "You have been awfully quiet the whole time."

"I'm just ... " she started to say something, but faltered miserably. Taking a deep breath, she tried again, "It's not like that I'm fond of Fornell or anything, but he was a good agent, dedicated and honourable at best. Seeing him betrayed and turned up dead, just like that, made me think."

Tony was at loss of what to say. He knew Kate was sympathetic by nature – it wasn't like it was a secret, especially with the way she connects with those around her – but he never knew how deeply she felt.

He watched as she opened the car's door and moved out. Only then did he realize they stopped right in front of a church. Cutting the ignition, he grabbed his coat and got out to follow her.

The church was quiet. There wasn't much people in there this late. The candle lights projected a soft, serene glow to the whole interior.

Kate seemed oblivious that he had followed her. She knelted and crossed herself as per rituals before moving to the front to light a candle in front of the Virgin Mary's statue being knewing down and started praying.

Tony stood at the back of the church, watching her movement but not approaching her. Kate's shoulders were shaking, and it didn't take an investigator to figure out that she was crying. Tony stood rooted in place. He knew Kate was a proud woman, and that she was too proud to cry openly in front of someone, especially one she had to work with. She needed to think things through, he realized, and praying was the outlet to her fears and pain.

It took a while, but Kate seemed to have calm down eventually. She looked up to the serene Lady's face, and Tony could see the tear tracks on her face in the dim light. Deciding it was probably the best time to offer her his companionship, he walked up to the front and stood beside her.

"Thanks for waiting," she murmured when he was closed enough.

Tony nodded, "That's what partners do, right? We look after each other."

"I guess," Kate nodded when she stood up and put on her coat. "But still, thanks."

"You're welcome," he accepted and offered her his hand. "Want to get something to eat? You skipped dinner."

Smiling softly, she took his hand.

Kate's mood seemed to have improved as the two friends sat and had dinner together. Tony was glad to see Kate relaxed. His goal for the evening was to replace Kate's earlier frustration and sadness with good humour, and it seemed like his jokes were working. They were talking softly when they entered the restaurant, and by the time the main courses were served, the usual light banters returned.

"I've never been here before, but this is good," Kate complimented when she tirled spaghetti with her fork.

"I come here all the time," Tony answered. "My mom loves the pasta here. She still comes here everytime she comes visit."

"Where's she right now?"

"Idaho, living with my older brother and his kids. She keeps hinting to me she wants more to spoil though," Tony laughed a little.

"That's what all the moms say, Tony," Kate grinned.

"Yeah, I suppose," he replied with a grin, "I guess I should tell her about our visit to the clinic seeing whether or not I fathered a child, eh?"

Kate almost choked on her drink when she heard that.

"What?" Tony laughed at her reaciton. "We were very good, you know. The roomful of people believed our cover and thought we were really a couple expecting a baby."

"Yeah," Kate commented. "A very twisted couple, but we were still great nonetheless."

"Yes, we were," he agreed, laughing. "The many times I thought of us together, we'd be out of the ordinary, never this crazy and twisted ."

Suddenly, Tony's laughters died as realization hit him. He just indirectly admited to have dreamed of being a couple with Kate, and he had no idea how the pretty woman sitting across him would react.

After a few moment so uncomfortable silence, Kate took a deep breath, "Tony, did you say what I thought you just said?"

He was in conflict with himself. On one hand, he thought this would be the perfect opportunity to talk about the topic, to get his feelings out in the open. On the other hand, he didn't want to make things strain, or kill off any chances that they might very well realized his dreams in the future.

"Tony?" Kate prompted again. She waited patiently, holding her breath. She still didn't know if she had interpreted his message correctly, but the little hint that he had thought about being with her, numerous times, made her stomach flutter.

"If you don't like what you heard, can we pretend I never said that?" he asked, looking at her finally. He couldn't read his partner's face, and he would be damn if he ruine done of the most satisfying relationship in his life because his brain didn't sensor what came out of his mouth again.

"I never said anyting about not liking what I heard, did I?" Kate, being the trained profiler that she was, could see the insecurities and turmoil in Tony's look, and knew it was unfair for her to be fishing for Tony's emotions while she held hers inside. She needed to give a little as well.

A sharp intake of breath indicated Tony's shock at hearing what she said. He had expected Kate to ask what just happened be forgotten. Never had he thought Kate would be interested in anything beyond friendship at this stage.

Taking a deep breath to calm his nerve, he decided it would be time to come clean, consequences be damned.

"I meant every word I said, Kate," he looked into her eyes when he declared. "I told the truth and only the truth. Yes, I thought about you and I, together, as an item."

"Oh," what all Kate managed to get out.

"Can you," Tony gestured with his hand, trying to gauge her reaction, "say something? Hit me if you want, or yell at me, but tell me what you're thinking, please?"

"I ... "Kate stuttered. She had no idea how to tell Tony what she was thinking as there were so many thoughts and emotions all in her mind. "I'm glad."

"You are?" Tony let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "So, you mean you ..."

"I've thought about us together too," she admitted softly and shifted her gaze to the plate of food in front of her. "I just never thought you'd feel the same way."

Silence fell between the two of them. Neither of them knew the right thing to say; both of them needed time to take in all the information.

They finished the rest of the meal in silence. Finally, when the waiter arrived with the dessert menu, Tony looked up at his companion.

"Kate," he started and waited until she looked up to look at him. "You want any dessert, or do you want to get coffee ... somewhere else?"

Kate was silent again, and Tony bit his lips, trying to see what was going on inside the brunette's head.

"Kate?"

"I think my place is closer, don't you think?"

Tony grinned at the implication. "I think so too."

Kate's apartment was way more feminine than Tony would have imagined. He hadn't been invited to her apartment before, but he'd always thought Kate would go with a modern design. Never had he thought Kate would have an apartment so homey.

He was fingering a picture frame when Kate returned to the living room with two cups of coffee. Silently, she set them down on the coffee table in front of him and settled on the other end of the couch and curled up.

"So, we should talk about this, shouldn't we?" she asked hesitantly. "I mean ... there were so many things that weren't said, and that we were ... "

"I want to see where this will take us," Tony cut her babbling off. "I don' t think I've felt what I feel with you before, Kate, and I like that; I like that a lot. I want to see where this will take us, if that's okay with you."

Kate stared at Tony, surprised by his openness. She wasn't exactly prepared for Tony's honesty, but on the other hand, she appreciated it. At least she didn't have to guess what he was thinking.

"I'd like that very much too," Kate murmured and smiled shyly at him.

"Good," he responded with a smile and placed his cup on the coffee table in front. "Should we be setting some ground rules?"

"I don't see a point," Kate pondered for a moment before answering. "We're both reasonable agents. We both know what is appropriate and what is not. On top of that, we have Gibbs to answer to if we do something totally stupid. But more than everything, I trust you."

Tony chuckled at the part about Gibbs, and warm filled his inside at Kate's declaration of trust. She knew, as a woman working in the traditional boys' club, Kate often held herself very uptight and wouldn't let her emotions and inner thoughts out easily. He was glad she trusted him enough to reveal that part of herself.

Reaching over, he took her hand in his and started rubbing over her knuckles.

"We should take this slow," Tony suggested after a while.

"You're okay with that?" Kate raised an eyebrow so Tony could tell she was only teasing.

"I think this is for a long time, if not forever, Kate. I can wait, because I know it will be there for a long, long time," he chose to answer truthfully.

In the dim light of the apartment, Tony spotted something that looked suspiciously like tears in Kate's eyes, but he knew better than to point it out. His eyes travelled to her lips and couldn't resist the temptation.

"I'm going to kiss you now, Kate," he announced, inching his head closer to hers.

He was closing in slowly, too slowly, so Kate met him mid-way. Their lips met, and something sparked between them. It wasn't a heated kiss, but a gentle one fileld with the shyness of a first kiss and promises of a future to come.

When they broke apart for air, Tony rested his forehead on Kate's, "This is really happening, eh?"

"Yes," she nodded, her hands snaking around his neck so she could hold him close. "This is happening."

They stayed that way for a while, eaching enjoying the feel of having the other in their arms.

"I better go," Tony announced after he checked his watch and noted that it was close to 2 in the morning. "We still have work tomorrow."

"Stay," she murmured, refusing to release her hold on him.

"Kate ... " Tony said warningly.

"I just need you to be with me," she explained. "Nothing had to happen, but I just want you to be near me so that when I have nightmares about what happened today, what happened to Fornell, you can tell me that it's okay, that you're okay and alive and breathing."

"You have nightmares?" Tony asked, incredulous. "About me getting hurt?"

"Especially when we had a tough case or one of us was injured," she admitted, and looked up to look at him in the eye, "so stay? Please?"

"Anything for you, sweetie," he kissed her forehead before resting his against her again. "Anything for you."

- fin -


End file.
